Zola's work


Syria



2011
mid december

Friday 23
they bombed today. it hit close. near the garden. i was sitting in the kitchen with mama when they soared over. mama froze then ran to me grabbing my wrist and dragged me down under the table. she hugged me close to her chest, praying. i heard her heart beat fast and her breathing stop. waiting. everything was silent, then it happened. a big boom that shook the whole house. mama squeezed me tight, closing her eyes. after two more times our street turned quiet, everyone not knowing if it was over. mama slowly loosened her grip slipping out from under the table. she motioned me to stay where i was. i listened. silence. slowly standing up i hugged myself close. when will this ever stop.


Saturday 24
mama woke up late this morning. when she came for breakfast her eyes were red and puffy. i know she was crying about papa. i hear her in the night. she doesn’t know i do, thinks i’m fast asleep. papa left a few months ago. had to go help in the war. mama’s really sad. it’s usually just me and her because ashur isn’t here a lot. he’s trying to earn some money. when papa was here mama was happy as a bird not caring how much money we had, or when we spent it. now she seems like she’s always worried. i can see why.


Sunday 25
today is christmas and as a surprise ashur has come home! he says that he found a job in a town nearby. we had a cheer but you could see the worry on mama's face. this is where she gets work, where i go to school, where we live. she knows we won’t be able to leave which means ashur will have to go. leaving us alone once more.


Monday 26
this year we couldn’t afford to have break so i went to school today. i never really want to but mama makes me. she says i need to get a good education so i can get a good quality job and that nothing should get in the way of that. it's hard leaving her alone. my walk home from school is long. past the fields, past the trees and occasional house or building. today i walk and walk. i then hear something from above. i look into the gray autumn sky and see the fighter planes flying above. running to the trees close by i hope they hadn’t spotted me. i huddle close to a tree, tears creeping out of my eyes. i stay there until i am sure they are gone. continuing home i wipe away my tears and walk.


Tuesday 27
ashur is staying with us for another few days before he sets off for his job. it is wonderful to have him back but in the back of my brain there is the reminder, like a thin blanket of smoke, that he will have to leave soon.


Wednesday 28
i always thought that when ashur came home the house would be happier. more alive. but it seems like it has gotten worse. mama and ashur get into little arguments all the time. not even about important things. over things like chores or his sleeping schedule, which she has never cared about before. ashur may think that she is just being mean but I know the truth. she is trying to hide her sadness.


Thursday 29
their fighting has gotten worse. mama doesn't even talk to ashur anymore. i feel like i'm mashed in the middle. i can't take a side, and I don’t want to. it is getting colder. people are starting to realize that if they have lost their home and haven't gone to a camp or found a host family yet they need to now. before it gets too bad.


Friday 30
ashur is getting ready to leave in two days. i see him packing up all his belongings. i can't imagine saying goodbye again. soldiers have been moving into our city. no one knows which side they are from and we're too afraid to ask.


Saturday 31
more soldiers have come. People are getting more worried and leaving damascus. mama has said nothing to us about leaving but i am nervous. i tell ashur he should stay with us but he says he has to leave tomorrow for the job. i nod like i understood. the truth is i don't. i would always choose family over anything. also, tomorrow is the new year.
2012
january



Sunday 1
we have now left our city of damascus. in the middle of the night mama came into my room and shook me awake. she told me to get up quickly and pack the few things i need. i did as she said. then going into the kitchen i saw ashur already there looking like he was about to fall asleep again. “ashur,” mama whispered. waking him back up. she motioned for us to follow her out the door. i had so many questions swimming through my tired head. where are we going? why now? i decided to be silent. we crept through the empty streets. ashur and i right behind mama. she stopped, so we stopped. quickly she pulled us down. we saw two soldiers shadows pass. luckily they couldn’t see us since we were kneeling. slowly we resumed our walk. we are now in one of the many fields, hidden from view. i am now tired of this confusion. goodnight.


Monday 2
when i wake up i am confused to see the sun in the sky. then the happenings of last night crash into my brain. questions fly back into my head. where are we? why did we leave? where are we go-. my thoughts are broken by the arguing of mama and ashur. their voices get louder as they get closer. they enter the clearing and go silent when they see i am awake. “why’d we leave? where are we going? what’s happening?!” my questions erupt out of me. mama looks worriedly at ashur. “tira, sit.” obediently, i do as she says. “everyone is leaving to be safe. we need to get to somewhere that we can feel that way.” ashur starts talking. “i heard in town about a refugee camp in jordan. we can go there.” i try to process this information. suddenly tired again i lay down, and have a dreamless sleep.


Tuesday 3
one question wakes me up. what about papa? worried i wake up mama. “what? is everyone okay?!” she says startled. “what about papa?” i whisper. “how will he,” a sob breaks my sentence. i bend my head and mama hugs me. we’re silent until my crying slowly stops. “how will he know where we are?” i say, finishing my question. mama shrugs. “i don’t know, sweet pea. the fates will find a way.” suddenly, my sadness turns to anger. “this is all your fault!” i shout. “papa could have been with us now!” she bows her head, ashamed. “shhh, don’t wake ashur.” frustrated i run. i’m not sure where. i hear mama calling my name but i ignore her. exhausted, i collapse onto a tree and fall fast asleep.


Wednesday 4
i wake to the chirping birds. dazed i stand. i realize i shouldn’t have blamed mama. it’s not her fault. i should apologize. but first i need to do something. i start walking, not in any certain direction but i have a feeling like i know where i’m going. left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot… this is all i’m thinking. not taking in my surroundings. left foot, right foot, left foot… my feet stop. looking up i see i am at my house. it has just been one day and it has already been looted. the door is smashed through and the kitchen table is gone. trying to hold back my feelings i search for some piece of paper and something to write with. finally finding something i sit down on the floor and start to write.


dear papa
we have left and are heading to a camp in jordan. if you do get this please, try to find us or let us know you are safe.
we love you and really miss you. please find us.
tira


i use a tack to place my note on the wall. then after taking one last look at the house i rush out.



Epilogue


may



Sunday 6
a tall soldier walks through the city of damascus. he seems to be looking for something but doesn’t hurry. he finds a tiny abandoned and goes in. looking around he realizes it has been raided. anger crosses his face but then a little piece of paper catches his eye. it is tacked to the wall. he carefully rips it off. tears glisten in his eyes as he reads it. “i will find you.” he whispers. “i will.”




Stop animal testing
by Zola von Krusenstiern

      I believe that animals should not be used for testing new products. I believe this because animals are getting hurt and killed for our needs. Also, I believe that animals have rights too, even if they can't speak for themselves.
      Research shows many reasons why we should not use animals for testing. One reason is that over 100,000,000,000 animals lose their lives each year because they are in labs. This is just in the US. Even though we kill so many animals we still do tests on humans too but did you know that animals have different DNA then humans? Over 95% of drugs that pass the animal test fail when they are tested on humans.
      Animal testing is also very cruel and inhumane. Some tests involve killing pregnant animals so that scientists can test there unborn babies. Other tests usually used on mice, rats, rabbits, and guinea pigs involve chemicals being rubbed onto shaved skin or dripped in eyes with no pain relief. Also, force-feeding or deadly doses of chemicals are sometimes used.
      Although I believe that animals should not be used for testing not everyone else does. Some people might say that diseases like cancer can be cured if scientists use animals for testing. Since we have been using animals for testing, cancer survival rates have been going up. Things like hip replacement, kidney transplants, heart transplants, and blood transfusions were perfected on animals. Also, the tetanus vaccine, asthma inhalers, and insulin were tested on animals.
      I bet that if scientists tried there would be other ways that we could test new products without hurting other living things. Non-animal methods actually take less time and cost less then tests that use animals. Animal testing has gone on for way too long. It is time to stop.


Thanks for the help from...








               




                   The Case of Red. vs. Professor T. Wolf
                     by Zola Von Krusenstiern and Margaret Holland
                                                grade 5


Wednesday morning, Professor T. Wolf was summoned to court for attempting to eat Miss Red Riding Hood and her grandmother, Lily, two days before. Below read the stories from each side. Which side do you believe? Use the comment box to vote please.

                                               
Red’s Story

    Red was walking to her grandmother Lily’s house, delivering food that her grandmother needed. Red’s grandmother, Lily, was very sick. They weren’t sure what it was, but Red’s mother thought giving her healthy food would help. So she sent Red to do the job. Red took the short path. She was walking peacefully, until Professor T. Wolf came up to her and tried to get information about her. He asked these questions:
      1. Where are you going little one?
      2. Does your grandmother live far from here?
      3. Why not collect kindling for a fire? It will warm your granny’s heart and body.
      As Red was collecting kindling, the wolf ditched the little girl and went to Lily’s house. When Red finally noticed, she didn’t know where he went but she decided to go to her grandmother’s and when she walked into the house it was dead silent. She looked upstairs to find her grandmother. She wasn’t there, but she did see some drool on the floor. She was a little freaked out. But when she turned around there was a huge, and I mean HUGE wolf! She screamed and then he ate her too! When she went down she saw her grandmother. 
     The wolf started to choke and then the woodsman, Willy Johnson, heard all the chaos. He ran in, and when he saw the gigantic wolf then hurried to reload his tranquilizer and then shot the wolf. Then Red and her grandmother started to scream and the woodsman cut the wolf open and the got the two out. 
     Willy Johnson sewed him back up, and he also reported the wolf because he ate two other people before Red and Lily. The Wolf was brought to the hospital until he was healthy enough to stand trial.                                                 Wolf’s Story

     Professor T. Wolf was walking through the woods on his usual path to work at the Tale University when he bumped into a young girl, Little Red Riding Hood. He politely said hello but Little Red Riding Hood started bawling! 
     Of course Professor was distressed to see this little girl so sad and he tried to comfort her. She said that she was trying to get to her sick grandmother who lived in the woods and got lost. She also explained very precisely where her grandmother lived. Professor wanted to help so he gave her some firewood that lay nearby and called the university to tell them that he would be late. When he turned around Little Red Riding Hood was gone. He thought she might have remembered the way to her grandmother’s so he took the path that she told him about and arrived at Lily’s house.
     When he got there he knocked on the door. Nobody answered and he wondered if Red had given him the wrong address. He looked in the window, and saw a nice tidy cottage with a kitchen and big bed. Looking at the bed he saw the quilt moving up and down and realized Lily was sleeping in there.        Quietly, trying not to wake her, he walked inside the small cottage and silently sat down at the kitchen table.
     As the day crept on he started feeling hungry. Craving some tofu, (he is a vegetarian) he got up to look in the refrigerator when Red walked in the door screaming and shouting. At this, Professor was so startled that he sucked in 
very deeply and inhaled Red and her grandmother! He started choking and finally passed out.
     The woodsman had luckily heard Red screaming and came running up to the cottage. He knocked on the door and when nobody answered came in.
Of course if you saw the scene you would have made the same mistake. What would you think if you saw the bed blankets in a messy pile, the kitchen table over turned and in the middle of the floor a wolf, looking to be asleep 
and with a full stomach. Mr. Johnson was so frightened he grabbed his tranquilizer and tranquilized the unconscious Professor. Willy then heard the screams coming from inside the wolf and cut him open. Red jumped out and Johnson helped sick Lily back into bed. As he sewed Professor back up Red told him the whole story. Her version.

What do you believe? Is Professor Wolf guilty? Is Red telling the truth? Vote in the comment box!
     



                Finding Hope


                         By Zola von Krusenstiern - grade 5



I dedicate this book my family, who helped me put this book together, and all the other young writers, who will make the world brighter.


                                                  Maple Leaf Book Writing Project
                                                       Brattleboro, Vermont
                                                          Copyright 2013


     The wind in my hair. The sun’s heat beating down. The freedom I have. These are the reasons I love riding.
                                                                             1.

     I lie in bed thinking how much I hate nights. Night is when I have to calm down, when I have to leave Hope, when I can’t do what I want to do. I hate nights!
     I get up and tiptoe over to my window. Where is she?
     “Hope,” I whisper, looking into the cold night. “Hope.” I guess Dad put her in the barn. Going back to bed I turn on my light and take a random book off the shelf. Ferdinand, why does Julianna have to share my bookshelf?! I throw Ferdinand on the ground. Reading, not helping.
     I try counting back from one hundred. Dad always says he does it when he can’t sleep. 100, 99, 98, 97, 96… I count all the way down to zero. Counting, not helping. 11 o’clock. Why can’t it just be morning.
     I get out of bed again grabbing my sweatshirt, and creep out of my room. Dad is snoring. I slip on my sneakers and go downstairs out into the cool of autumn in Vermont. Leaves crunch under my feet as I walk to our big barn.
     “Hope.” I open the door and hug her warm neck. “Hey girl,”
     She nozzles my hand.
     Outside I jump on Hope’s back, clutch her black mane and lightly kick her. She starts slowly walking around our pen.
     Maybe I shouldn’t be out here, maybe it’s not safe. I shake away my doubts pulling closer to Hope.
The sky is, it’s almost pitch black. The only light is the glow from the moon and her star children.
I get sleepy from Hope’s rocking body and the peace of the night. Lying on my stomach I close my eyes. Hope’s mane slips from my fingers. Then everything goes black.

     “Shiloh?” It’s Dad.
     “I don’t think she’s awake.” Mom’s cold hand strokes my forehead. I slowly open my eyes.
     “Mom? Dad?” Everything looks fuzzy. “Where are you?” I try to stand. “Owww!!” I scream and collapse as darkness takes over.

     I wake in a tiny white room. Where? I hear voices.
     “Your daughter damaged nerves in her back and is paralyzed. She may have to use a wheelchair for the rest of her life. But we can try therapy and hope.”
     Someone is crying. Mom.
     Then a door closes and footsteps come to my bed. I pretend I’m sleeping.
     “It’s going to be okay,” Mom whispers then leaves. When I can’t hear her footsteps anymore I try to move my foot. I can’t.
     Closing my eyes again I try to sleep. It’s only when the taste of salt reaches my mouth that I notice I’m crying.

2.
     Everything is so hard! I can’t even go to the bathroom alone, never mind take a shower. I probably haven’t bathed for at least a week! Since I’m in bed most of the time I don’t really know how many days have passed. I don’t see a lot of people except my family and, once in a while, my best friend Lila.
We are in the same grade, ninth, so she brings me homework. I haven’t done much. I’m not that great at it. Never really was. Mom says I should do it because I need to stay caught up and it would give me something to do since I’m stuck in this bed.
     I look at what Mom brought from home, stuff she thought I’d like to have. Picking up my favorite Karen Hesse book I open to the bookmark and start reading words I have probably read a million times, I don’t realize time passing and suddenly I’m at the end of the book. Putting it down I try to think of something else to do. I wish my PT session were now.
     “Knock, knock!” Mom peeks her head in.
     Lila bursts into the room.
     “Hey! How you doing?” I ask turning off the TV.
     “Great. You?” She sits.
     “Good, I guess.”
     “Here,” she hands me a box. “Dark.” I hug her.
     “Thank you so much! How did you know I’ve been having chocolate cravings?” Biting into a piece, I try to savor every bit but like always I devour it. I eat three pieces then push it away. “Take this or I’m going to eat it all right now and not have any left!” Lila puts it on the bedside table.
“Thanks.”
       “No need for thanks. You know I’ll always be there for you.” She sits down. “Oh, guess what?! The drama club’s play just ended so I’m going to have more free time and can come see you everyday! But I’m meeting with the drama club for an end of play thing soon, so I have to leave early,” she says.
     “Lila! It’s 5:30,” Mom calls from the hallway.
     “Thanks! See you Shiloh. Text you later.”
     “Bye!” I pick up the TV remote.
     “Don’t you turn that TV on!” Mom comes into the room. “You’ve barely done any homework!” I put down the remote and pick up my bag from the side of my bed.
     “Shiloh?” Mom sits.
     “Yeah?” Mom suddenly seems serious.
     “You know when your cousin hurt his leg about two years ago?”
     I nod.
     “And remember how he went to physical therapy everyday?”
     I nod again
     “Tomorrow,” she pauses and starts over. “Your doctor said it’s time to come home and try doing a brand new kind of therapy. He told me about a man who was paralyzed from the neck down. He did this new PT and now walks without using anything,” Mom smiles.
     “So you’re saying that tomorrow I’m going home?!”
     She smiles again.
     I don’t know how to feel. Happy, scared? Closing my eyes I suddenly feel tired.
     “You okay?” Mom sounds worried.
     Opening them I answer, “Fine,” then close them again. Mom kisses my forehead and leaves.
Questions sweep through my head. Will Hope be blamed for the fall? Is she okay?
Can I do this?
3.
     “It’s going to be fine honey, don’t worry.” Mom tries to get me into my brand new wheelchair.
     “I’m not worried,” I lie. How am I not supposed to be worried?
     Taking a deep breath I remember my fifth grade teacher, Karen. She always told us to breathe. At the time it was a little annoying but right now it’s really helpful.
     I let myself be guided into the chair by Mom. Finally, I’m in, breathing hard. If I’m so tired just getting into a wheelchair how will I ever do the therapy, never mind walk or ride again!? Exhausted I let Mom push me out of the room and out of the building I’ve lived in for what feels like forever but has only been a week.
     “Now lets figure out how to get you into the car. Want to sit in the back so you can lie down or up front with me?”
     “Back,” I answer.
     Lying down I rest, or try to.
     Before I know it we’re there.
     Being wheeled down the front path my nervousness hits like a door slamming in my face. My eyes glaze over with tears. Mom must have seen me tense up because she stops and rubs my shoulders.
     “Its okay,” she whispers. “There’s nothing to worry about. Everyone here is wonderful.”
     Wiping my eyes I reach up to hug her neck and kiss her forehead. “What would I do without you? On we roll!” She laughs and wheels me inside.
     In the lobby there’s a young man with a shaved head.
     “Hello, my name is Ollie. You must be Kim Angier,” he says to Mom, extending his hand.
     “Yes.” She shakes it. “And this is Shiloh.”
     “Hello Shiloh. I win to be your physical therapist!’’
     I try to smile. “Hi,” I muster.
     “Follow me.” He leads us down a narrow hallway, then into a white room with a big window.
Fire colored leaves spread across the front lawn outside. Fall is so beautiful and I’ve spent a whole week of it in a miniature hospital room with one window.
     “Shiloh?”
     “Yes?” I turn.
     “Do you know how to use a wheelchair on your own?” Ollie asks.
     “Not yet.”
     “Lets start there,” he says.
     Ollie demonstrates. It’s really hard and my muscles burn afterward but he says it will get easier.
     “Okay, see you tomorrow,” he says.
     “Already?” I don’t want to leave!
     I try to wheel myself but I’m too tired so Mom helps me.
     “See you soon!” I say enthusiastically as Mom takes me to the car to bring me home. Bring me home to Hope, to fall and all the other wonderful things in life. Finally!


4.
     “You ready to get on the treadmill?” Ollie asks.
     “Yes!” We go to the hall and into the ‘gym.’ Mom and Ollie help me get on the treadmill and I hold myself up by using the sidebars. Very challenging!
     Ollie starts the treadmill. I try to walk or at least stay up. The first time I tried, two weeks ago, I passed out almost immediately. Now I can do it for almost fifteen minutes. A picture of Hope in my mind always keeps me going.
     After thirteen I need to take a break. “Done,” I pant.
     “It’s been two weeks,” Ollie says stopping the treadmill.
     “Yep.”
     “You’re ready.”
     “For what?”
     “To go back to school.” A huge smile sprouts on his face.
     I’m speechless. Go back? To hallways? Homework? Back to friends?  I want to jump up and hug him. But of course I can’t. “Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!”
     “Hey, just thank yourself and all the people that helped you in the hospital.”
     I feel so happy and free, a little scared too but it doesn’t put me down.
     “Can I do more treadmill?” I ask feeling pumped.
     “Sure!”
     I believe I can do anything. Now one minute, five, ten. Before I know it I’ve been on the treadmill for twenty minutes! Will I actually be able to ride Hope again?!
     “Yes! I did it!”
     Collapsing into my wheelchair I exhale. My new record, I ‘walked’ for twenty minutes! With happiness I cry that I can go back to school and that I made a new record. Then my happy tears turn into sobs. Why am I happy that I stayed up for twenty minutes when I used to be able to ride Hope for three hours?
     I miss Hope so much. I sob for Hope and for me.
     Mom wheels me out. I have no strength, no power, just weakness and vulnerability.
     At home Mom helps me on the couch, which has been my bed since I have come home, kisses my cheek and leaves. I turn my head and look out the window. Having a clear view of the barn I see Hope, sticking her head out the window.
     I hear Dad come home. Low voices. Then his voice raises.
     “Are you sure she’s ready?”
     “I’m positive, Max. You know, today she stayed for twenty minutes on the treadmill, twenty minutes!”
     “Two weeks seems too soon.”
     “Don’t worry. She’ll have lots of help.” 
     Their voices die as they walk upstairs to their bedroom.
Madness bubbles up inside. Why doesn’t Dad have faith in me? Why doesn’t he think I can manage school? I try to calm down and see his side.
     Maybe he’s right. Maybe I’m not ready. Maybe I WILL be too far behind and not know what to do. Maybe I won’t be able to get around by myself when Lila has a different class than me.
I pull up the blanket and clear my head. It will be all right. I repeat this over and over in my head. It’s my last thought before I fall asleep.
  
5.
     “i’ll b rite ovr :)” Lila texts.
     “c u “ I answer putting down my phone. Wheeling into the kitchen I make sure I have everything. Binders, check. Math, Science and Social Studies textbooks, check, check. Where’s my Social Studies?
     “Mom, have you seen my Social Studies textbook?” I yell.
     “On the table. Maybe it fell.”
     “I don’t see it,” I go into the living room. Maybe I brought it in here.
     The doorbell rings.
     “I’ll get it!” Julianna calls.
     She stamps down the stairs and swings open the door.
     “Lila!” Julianna tackles Lila in a big bear hug, then accidentally drops the book she’s holding.  
       "Oops,” she says picking it up.
     I put out my hand. “What have I said about touching my stuff.”
     “Sorry, I couldn’t reach my markers and Mom was busy.” She hands me my textbook then gives Lila another hug.
     “You ready?” Lila asks.
     “Yeah.” NO! I scream in my head. “Mom! We’re going!”
      “Wait!” Mom yells, coming in and kissing my cheek. “You don’t need to be nervous, okay? I packed your lunch so you wouldn’t-”
     I cut her off. “Mom! It’s okay, chill. Bye.” I kiss her then wheel out of the house and down the front walk.
     School here we come! Lila pushes me into school. Immediately Angie and Lakota run over.
     “Shiloh we missed you so much!” Angie screams hugging me.
     Lakota does the same. “I’m really sorry we never visited.”
     “It’s ok, I wasn’t really in the mood to see people,” I say hugging them back.
     The bell rings. “See you later!” Angie says. She and Lakota laugh as they run to their first class. I tell myself that I’ll be running too, someday.
      “Lets go,” Lila pushes me to math.
     Taking out the homework I actually did do I feel sorta guilty. I should have done more.
     “Welcome back Ms. Angier,” Mr. Scott says in his deep familiar voice.
     “Hi,” I say meekly handing him my homework. “Sorry I didn’t get more done. I’ll catch up.”
     He nods. “Ms. Danner please take your seat. Shiloh, you can sit at the side table.” I feel awkward as I wheel myself to the side, sensing everyone’s eyes staring into me. Mr. Scott is not making my first day back to school easier.
     During the rest of the morning classes I’m in a daze with teachers welcoming me back and students either staring at me or trying hard not to, making me feel like an alien. At lunch I meet Lila and Lakota.
     “Did you see Angie in Science?” Lakota asks.
     “What, I don’t know. Sorry, I’m not paying attention today,” rubbing my head I wish I was in bed. “I’m really tired.”
     “Come on Shiloh, lets eat in Study Hall,” Lila smiles.
     “Yeah!” Lakota brightens. “Just let me get my lunch.” She dashes off.
I laugh. I'd almost forgot how laughing felt. How it warms your whole body. How it makes you feel like you could fly around the world.
     “How was school honey?” Mom asks, when I get home.
     “Good,” I respond vaguely, wheeling into the house. In the kitchen I heave my heavy backpack off my lap, lying my head on the table.
     I’m overwhelmed. 
6.
     “Shiloh! You awake?!” Julianna yells in my face.
     “Hmmm,” I realize that last night was the first full night I’ve slept in a long time.
     “It’s Saturday wake up!”
     I pull the blanket back over my head. Just a few more minutes, I’m still so tired.
     “Ok fine, but I’m still watching cartoons in here,” Julianna pouts turning on the TV. So annoying!
Then she sneaks under the blanket with me and I fall back asleep.

     When I wake Julianna's gone and the house is silent. The afternoon sunbeams shine through the panes. So peaceful. But, I realize I'm starving! Pulling my wheelchair close to the couch I transfer myself, and wheel into the kitchen. There's a note on the table and food!! I take a huge bite of the apple then read the note.
Shiloh,
Dad and I will be back shortly.
Love, Mom

     Later when Mom gets home I watch her put on her muck boots and overalls, getting ready to clean Hope's stall. She starts heading outside.
     That used to be my job. I want it back. I used to be the one to feed her, clean her stall, brush her. Now all that responsibility falls onto my parents already heavy shoulders. What once was a chore is now a craving, something I miss.
     I wheel out to Mom and Hope. Watching I imagine myself standing up and helping, something I might never be able to do again. I feel my heart pound and in to the pit of my stomach.
     "Hey honey! You need something?"
I shake my head in a daze. I need Hope. She slowly walks over from her stall. I reach up and stroke her warm neck. "I missed you too," I whisper. Then I feel something. A tingle. Just a little one, in my right foot. Tears well up in my eyes. "Mom!" I yell with glee.
     "What is it?!" she says.
     "My foot!" I bend down and rip of my shoe and sock. It wiggles! "I can move my toe!"
     She falls on her knees and laughs. I laugh. Now I know! 
     There will always be Hope.


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