Wyatt's page

 Raisins

              

    One day I was walking down main street and my cat appeared and clawed out my jugular then she left me there bleeding a giant river of blood down the street purring as she walked away. You could see my organs spilling out of the gaping hole in my throat and my body shriveling up like a little raisin.                                            This is what I imagined sitting in nutritional eating class thinking about what people do to make sweet juicy grapes into dinky brown raisins. Everybody in my class loves them but I think they are a disgrace to grape-kind. Whenever I try to eat one I feel like I'm going to erupt and sometimes when I manage to swallow one I actually do. Then it's usually a huge issue to clean up, but imagining me eating a whole pack of them! It would be a big, icky, wet, slimy, and green apocalypse massacre thingy!               

    The next day when I sat down during lunch Darren Farquo and Sam Gobouski sat down right across from me. Great. The Terrible Twosome. Now I wish I had a whole pack of raisins and was vomiting all over them.

    “Want to bet that you can't eat a pack of raisins?” said Darren.

    “For what?” I replied.

    “100 bucks.”

    “No thanks,” I said thinking about how horrible it would be.

    “If you don't eat them I'm going to strap you to a chair and make you watch Teletubbies,” said Sam.

    “Fine! Where the classroom?” I said.

    “Sure,” said Darren.

    Later that night I dreamed that I was forced to watch the ever dreaded Teletubbies, oh I so hate that show. I hate it so much it's almost worse than raisins. When I was very little I watched it but years later I tried it again and it scarred me for life.

    “TINKY WINKY!” said Tinkywinky.

    “POE POE POE POE POE!” said Poe.

    “AAUUUGGHH” I yelled.

    “TINKY WINKY?”

    “TINKY POE WINKOE PINKY TOE WINKY DOE!”

    Suddenly I woke up breathing heavily and drenched in sweat. I lay there all night thinking about if I really was going to eat the raisins.

    When it became morning I got ready for school and once I was halfway there Swettchunk Honkerpants jumped out in front of me and knocked me over. Chunk is the school bully. He's always a brute and he runs like a rhino and knocks people over as if they were bowling pins.

    “Hey bub, I heard you were going to eat a pack of raisins. I'd love to see that,” Chunk said

and ran off down the street. Boy that kid is in need of some physical help in order to get weaker. Gosh is he scary.

    My school is kind of annoying because it's big and made of bricks I hate bricks. Some people say I'm too negative and very crazy but I think I'm the only one around here with any brains. It's a fact that bricks are bad and it takes brains to hate bad things.

    When I arrived everyone was begging me to eat the raisins, I guess Darren told everyone in the school. Finally when I got into my classroom I did.

    “BLOGEPORUGUROASHIPOTTYDCUOOH!”

    I puked EVERYWHERE! Up, down, left, and right, and in front of me. Every square inch within barf range was covered in brown and green raisin sludge and everyone was laughing. I just wanted to desiccate into a little ball and roll into a box that's being shipped to the Himalayas. I'm always lonely in school because I have no friends. But now I am glad I don't have any friends to laugh at me.

    After the incident the teacher made me wait in the nurse's office for about half an hour until my mom picked me up and brought me home. Later I was lying in my bed when my mother came in and told me I was allergic to raisins. Well all of this would have made a whole lot more sense if I had known that from the start and maybe I wouldn't have accepted that dare. Yet I'm still happy because I got my 100 dollars! Oh well now I know I can't eat raisins but there is another food I despise...

Kiwi.

Everybody should brush his or her teeth

By Wyatt Rosinski 

 

      There has been an issue of people not brushing their teeth any more. If you don’t brush your teeth your mouth will get dirty and worms will grow in your mouth and pop out of your teeth. I know that nobody wants to have worms breeding and pooping in his or her mouth. When you are asleep the worms will grow and grow in population and when you wake up in the morning worms will be pouring out of your mouth and all over the floor!

      Studies show that worm larvae live in the molars of humans as soon as the molars form. Scientists have discovered that the larvae try to break out of your teeth then they try to push themselves out of the cracks. When a worm breaks through your teeth it grows to it’s to adult size: 5 inches long!

The way to counteract this situation is by brushing your teeth.

      When you brush your teeth the bristles go into the cracks therefore hurting the worm, and the toothpaste will seal the cracks. If you don’t brush your teeth regularly the worms will heal from the last time the bristles hurt them and they will start trying to break your teeth again causing them to make more cracks. When you brush your teeth the bristles poke the worm, causing the worms to stop trying to break through your teeth.

      Some people might think they should have worms in their mouth because they want to throw up something poisonous that they previously ate, or they might want to breed worms in their mouth to sell and make a lot of money. People actually buy worms for fishing and compost.

      Yuck! I hope NOBODY! Would want worms in

their mouth. Do you really want to wake up in the morning and find out your mouth is infested with worms? I didn’t think so!